Ms Congeniality - I

Crowns and Roses
~Yuri~
MS CONGENIALITY

Once upon a time, a serial killer indicated that his next target would be someone in the Miss USA beauty pageant. So the FBI decided that they must get an undercover agent to enter as a participant in the contest. The only available and suitable candidate is a bumbling female agent. Reluctantly, they enter her in the contest, replacing a contestant from the state of New Jersey who was discovered to have acted in a porno film. The organizers are aghast about the FBI agent appearing in the pageant, but arrange a top trainer (probably someone like me ! heh heh) to give her a quick makeover, with the expected outstanding results. Like all happy stories, the killer is caught in the end. You’ve all probably seen this movie. I am talking about Ms Congeniality where Sandra Bullock plays the undercover agent and enters the pageant as a contestant. She also eventually wins the Ms Congeniality title.

All beauty pageants worth their name have the Ms Congeniality title as one of the important sub contests because, to win it, all contestants try and be at their best behavior with each other, even when the organizers and judges are not watching. This lends itself to a more convivial atmosphere all around during the days leading up to the pageant and hence, is important to the pageant itself being a success. Some pageants call it Ms Amity, though the qualities required to win it are essentially the same. Amity means friendship, and congeniality means being pleasant, kind, and helpful.

In the next few issues, I’m going to take you through the art of being congenial. We’ll try and see what behavioral qualities you need to adopt to become Ms Congeniality. This will help you not just in a pageant, but in life in general as you will learn to be a better friend.

I have drawn up for you, what I call the Seven Challenges of Congeniality. One by one, let’s see what these challenges are. From this issue onwards, we are also starting a contest. You will be asked one question, and from out of the correct answers, one lucky winner will be chosen by a draw of lots. The winner will get 3 sessions of one to one training with me, free of cost. The answer to the question will always be somewhere within the article itself, so read on, carefully !

The First Challenge of Congeniality is : Learn to Love Yourself.
Feel Good about Yourself, that’s where you have to start. Here are a few pointers to help you on your way.

1. If you must examine your faults, do so with the mirror, not a magnifying glass – don't allow them to get out of proportion. Don't say, "I'm buried in debt." Say, "I owe Rs 10,000 in loans."
2. Learn to do without the word "should". Don’t say, "I should have finished that job on Friday," substitute the word "could". Realize you have the option of exercising your own choice.
3.Rethink your mistakes as lessons learnt, which will help you to forgive yourself for the mistake and prevent future ones.
4. Next time somebody compliments you, don't automatically protest, as some people do, but gracefully accept the complement.
5. Discard the myth of perfection. Nobody does everything perfectly.
6. Never compare yourself with others; the point is to improve on your own performance.
7. Give yourself time to feel good. When you reach an objective, allow for a period of celebration before going on to the next goal.
8. Give yourself a pep talk. Encourage yourself just as you would encourage your best friend, or as a best friend would do for you.
9. Wake up happy. Begin each day with a fun routine. Sing in the shower. If you're not already in a cheerful mood, put on your favorite song or CD; load it into your music system the night before.
10. Start each morning with a vision of yourself doing all the right things at work, at play and at home. Mentally rehearse the act of winning, just as the professional performers and athletes do.
11. Don't wait to get sick to take care of your health. Have a salad for lunch. Sign up for a gym. Snack on fruit instead of junk food.
12. Even if you're not feeling confident, act as if you are. Soon you will realize you're no longer faking it.
13. Affirm your power to change – or to remain the same. If you aren't ready to give up a bad habit such as smoking, accept that at this time you choose this habit as a method of coping, and that you can soon choose to replace it with a healthier one.

Start with these tips, learn to love yourself, because only if you allow yourself these liberties, will you be able to grant others their shortcomings and learn to treat them with more congeniality.

The Second Challenge of Congeniality coming up in the next issue. In the mean time, answer this simple question and win yourself 3 free one-on-one training sessions with me.

The Question : What state of the United States of America does Sandra bullock represent in the movie 'Miss Congeniality'?

The answer is somewhere within this article. Shoot off your answers to yuriyuriyuri@gmail.com.

See you next time.